


Not as It Seems

by gray_autumn_sky



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-28
Updated: 2016-06-28
Packaged: 2018-07-18 20:13:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,571
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7329178
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gray_autumn_sky/pseuds/gray_autumn_sky
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Robin secretly takes a class, Regina misunderstands and jumps to conclusions.</p>
<p>(A post-S5 AU with a little bit of angst and a little bit of fluff.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not as It Seems

Her heartbeat begins to fade and her mouth goes dry—it’s not the response she would have expected from herself. She would have expected her jaw to tighten and her fingers to ball into fists as her blood began to boil in her veins; rage would have taken over her senses—fully and completely until it was all she could think of or feel— and she would have confronted the situation. But as she stands there—watching Robin and _some woman_ laughing together over cups of coffee, watching as she pats his knee, watching as he smiles in return, so softly and genuinely as their eyes meet—she only feels sadness and a deep sense of defeat. She turns away, walking down long path back to Main Street, fighting to keep her tears at bay.

Two weeks ago, she hadn’t believed it; she’d said that there was no way. She said that Robin would never cheat to her; after all, their lives were finally peaceful and they loved each other—they finally had everything they said they wanted. Ruby and Belle had exchanged glances and told her that they truly hoped that they were wrong—and Regina had assured them that they were, and in that moment, she had been _so_ sure. Her belief in _them_ had been unshakable. And then little by little, distrust started to seep in; she started to notice things—little things she would have otherwise dismissed—and her doubt began to deepen. She tried to ignore it and she tried to hang to her faith; but now, that seemed impossible given that that she’d seen the proof herself.

As she gets into her car and turns the key in the ignition, her tears begin to fall, streaming down her cheeks as her heart clenches in her chest. She slams her hands against the steering wheel—she should have known better, she tells herself. She should have known that what they had was too good to be true—that _he_ was too good to be true—and she feels like such a fool.

She takes the rest of the day off and arranges for Snow and David to take the kids for the night—she’s not sure what she’s going to do, but she knows she doesn’t want the kids around for it; and there’s no way, she can put on a mask for them and pretend that everything’s okay. But the house is too quiet without them and she spends the afternoon alone with her thoughts, and still, the rage doesn’t come; the sadness only deepens.

When he comes in, he comes in through the back door and he looks genuinely surprised to see her sitting at the kitchen counter. Nonetheless, he smiles in her direction and brushes his lips across her cheek as he passes, taking off his satchel and dropping it onto the counter space beside the sink as he checks on whatever’s cooking in the crock pot.

She doesn’t respond to him; instead, she focuses on breathing—somehow, she feels incapable of doing both.

His brow creases as he looks back at her from over his shoulder. “Is everything okay?” When she doesn’t reply, he turns around and leans against the counter where she sits. “You look like you’re a million miles away.” She takes a breath and slowly exhales it, trying to build up her nerve, but still she says nothing in fear that her voice will crack as soon as she speaks and her tears will start all over again. “Regina?” He asks, reaching out and touching his fingers to the back of her hand.

She looks down at his hand over hers, his thumb rubbing gently against her wrist. Taking another breath, she looks up at him. “Where were you? You’re…you’re usually here when I get home.”

“We were running…low on baby wipes,” he tells her, his voice beginning to trail as she withdraws her hand. “I was afraid things would get…messy…without them.” He pauses and she can feel his eyes focused on her, and once more, she takes a breath. “Regina, what’s…”

“Are you happy?” She asks, cutting in as she finally looks up at him. “Is this what you want?”

“What?” He asks, blinking as his eyes widen; he’s clearly caught off guard by her question.

“It’s a simple question,” she says, clenching her jaw as she struggles to keep it steady; it’s bad enough that her voice has betrayed her by shaking. “Because, if you’re not, you know that you’re under no obligation to stay.” She blinks back her tears and looks at him, trying to distance herself from her emotions—she was once so good at that, yet now she barely manages. “We’re not married, so if this isn’t what you want, walking away is…easy.”

“Easy,” he repeats, shaking his head as he looks at her in disbelief. “What the hell are you talking about?”

“I’m giving you an out.”

“And why are you doing that?”

“Please. Don’t make this harder than…”

“Make _this_ harder? And what exactly is _this_?” He asks, his voice rising and his tone indignant. “Regina, I have _no idea_ what you’re talking about.”

“Don’t…” She says in a hoarse whisper. “Don’t be coy about it.”

“About _what_?!” He demands, his eyes growing wide as his brow furrows deeper.

She scoffs and shakes her head—if she didn’t know better, she would believe his confusion were genuine. Swallowing hard, she pushes the lump in throat down and looks up at him, her eyes finally meeting his. “I saw you. I saw you with her and I…”

“Her?”           

“Robin, please...I saw you…”

“You saw me in the park this afternoon with Carolyn?”  He sighs and rolls his eyes. “Regina, you have no idea what you’re talking about. You mis…”

“Are you _actually_ going to _deny_ it?” She interjects, her own voice raising an octave. “I _saw_ _you_ with her.”

For a moment, there’s a palpably uncomfortable silence that settles between them; and though they don’t speak, their eyes remain locked—for a brief moment, she wonders if she somehow misunderstood. And then she thinks of his laugh in the park, the way he’d smiled at her—how his eyes hand crinkled as his smile spread across his face, the way her hand had fallen and rested on his knee—so easily, as if it were routine, as if she’d done this before. She thinks of how her lungs had constructed and heart had clenched in her chest; she thinks of how the tears stung in her eyes as she realized what it all meant, hating herself for believing that someone could truly want to be with her, that someone could truly love her, and that it could last forever.

“I can’t believe this,” he murmurs through a clenched jaw. “I _can’t believe_ you would have that little trust in me.” The accusation stings; he all but admitted it just a moment before, yet somehow he sounded as if she were in the wrong. “Do you _really think_ I’d cheat on you?” 

“It wouldn’t be the first time, would it?”

“That was…a low blow, even for you,” he says, in an even, but angry voice as he pushes himself away from the counter and lifts the flap of his satchel. He pulls out a book and tosses it onto the counter, letting it land with a thud. “Like I said, you have _no idea_ what you’re talking about.” She can feel him watching as stares at the book. “I’m going to take a shower

He disappears and no sooner than he does the tears she’d been struggling against begin to fall.  Slowly, she reaches for the book and through teary eyes she reads the title— _A History of the Twentieth Century: How Technology Changed the World_ —and her brow furrows at the realization that it’s a text book. For some reason, she hadn’t anticipated that, though she’s not sure that it matters. Taking a breath, she opens it and in the margins she sees his writing—notations and questions scribbled in blue ink—and in one of the pages in a folded sheet of paper—a receipt for college class. A knot begins to form in her stomach as she slides from the stool, wondering if there’s more to the story than she knows. Slowly, she makes her way to where his satchel sits. She peeks inside to see a plastic bag from the pharmacy; there are baby wipes inside and for some reason, it makes her smile. 

Holding book in her hands she goes upstairs and sits on the edge of their bed, feeling numb and wondering if it’s possible that she’s wrong about all of this, that he was telling her the truth when he said she didn’t understand what she’d seen that afternoon. He had been so insistent when he told that it wasn’t true and there’d been such conviction in his voice, such hurt in his eyes. Again, she feels warm tears brimming as she looks at the picture that sits on the nightstand at his side of the bed—a snapshot of the five of them, cuddled up on the couch for a family movie night just a few weeks before. In the photo graph she and the kids are all smiling toward the camera that Henry’s holding out in front of them, expect for Robin who is smiling at her and even in the photograph his adoration for her is nearly palpable—and again, she finds herself wondering if something could have changed in such little time.

The knot in her stomach tightens as she hears the water turn off and a moment later, the door opens. He stops and lingers there for a moment, likely waiting to see what she has to say now and likely hoping for an apology.

“You’re taking a class,” she says as she looks up at him. “I…didn’t know that.”

“I didn’t want you to,” he tells her plainly. “And Carolyn, the woman you saw me with this afternoon, was my instructor.”

“I see…”

“I’m not having an affair, Regina.” He takes a breath and she nods—she’s unconvinced but she’s not convinced either; and nonetheless, she’s willing to listen. “And I am so sorry that you spent your day thinking that I was.”

“Okay…” She begins as he sits down beside her on the edge of the bed. “So, this afternoon, the woman I saw you in the park with was your instructor…and she was feeling her way up…”

“Regina,” he cuts in with a sigh. She stops and allows him to continue. “The class is mostly online, but we have to meet with her to go over assignments and such, but her office hours don’t work for me. It’s in the middle of naptime, so she was kind enough to make other arrangements.” He pauses for a moment. “Today, was the final day and we were talking—and yes, laughing—about how difficult it is to adjust to this world for those of us who came here the second time around—and yes, her hand did fall onto my knee.” He pauses and shrugs his shoulders. “I’m not sure completely sure what you saw, but at one point, I was telling her about my struggles with the broiler. She thought the story—a story about you and me—was endearing.”

A faint grin edges onto Regina’s lips as she thinks about the evening she’d come in from work to find the entire kitchen and everything in it—including Roland—covered in white foam. Robin had been holding the fire extinguisher and Henry had been holding the baby, shielding her from the mess. He’d grinned sheepishly and told her she couldn’t believe she’d keep something as dangerous as a broiler in the house.

“Regina, I _swear_ to you, I am _not_ having an affair with her,” he says again, tentatively reaching out and touching his hand to hers. When she doesn’t pull away, his fingers fold around her hand. “I would _never_ do that to you. I wouldn’t do that to our family.” He pauses. “So, contrary to what you may think, it _wouldn’t_ be _easy_ for me to just walk away and I _don’t want_ an out.”  

Taking a breath, she looks down at their hands and feels herself nod. “Then why didn’t you tell me about the class?”

“I don’t know,” he sighs. “I…wanted it to be a surprise and…maybe I was a little embarrassed about it.”

“Embarrassed?” She asks, looking up at him. “Why would you be embarrassed about taking a class?”

He shrugs. “Sometimes, I don’t feel like I fit in this world—your world—and I thought maybe if I knew more about it or I…” He stops and shakes his head, and slowly she turns her hand in his and gives it a soft, reassuring squeeze. “I don’t know, I suppose I just…wanted to impress you.”

A slow smile tugs at the corners of her mouth, “You did?”

“Yeah, but it I looks like I’ve failed miserably,” he says, shrugging his shoulders meekly. “Regina, I…I know I keep saying it, but was you saw wasn’t…”

“I believe you,” she says, inhaling a sharp breath and slowly exhaling it. “If you say it was nothing, then…it was nothing.”

“You do?”

She nods, “Yeah. I do. And I’m sorry that I…doubted you, that I jumped to conclusions...” Her voice trails off and her hand tightens around his. “I’m also sorry about what I said, in the kitchen, about…you having cheated before. That wasn’t fair…and…for the record…I wasn’t talking about New York.” She sighs. “I was talking about us, before New York. It was poorly worded, but still a low blow.”

“It’s okay,” he interjects as a soft smile forms on his lips. “I would be lying if I said that this whole thing didn’t sting quite badly, but…its okay.” He pauses and then his smile widens. “Besides, a little sting is better than a burn.”

She tries to laugh but it catches in her throat. “I’m sorry,” she tells him again—and she truly is sorry that she believed he would hurt her in such a way, sorry that her faith in what they had together had waivered, and she’s sorry that her accusation hurt him.

“I am, too. I should have told you about the class.”

“Are you…still angry with me?”

“Honestly,” he begins with a long sigh. “A little bit.” Nonetheless, he leans in and presses a soft kiss to her temple. “But it’s nothing I won’t get over.”

Turning her face, her lips brush over his. She turns herself, resting her forehead against his as her fingers rub against his stubbly cheek, cradling his jaw as she breathes him in, feeling so grateful to have been so wrong. “Do you think there’s any way we can just…forget that today happened?”

“I don’t know,” he murmurs back. “But I certainly wouldn’t be opposed to trying.”

Again, her lips brush over his and this time, she catches his bottom lip between hers, sucking gently at it until he starts to lean in. She pushes her fingers into his hair as he kisses her back—and for a brief moment, it feels like they’ve succeeded.


End file.
